A too-busy reality can run you and your loved ones ragged - and do real damage to your family's happiness in the process. Here's how to make time for the healthy priorities that really matter.    BY John De Graaf

Jennifer Pelton couldn't keep up with her frantic schedule, and it was making her - and her family - sick.

The 36-year-old mother of three was working full-time as the primary fundraiser for a nonprofit law organization in Baltimore. She also volunteered at her children's school, served on the governance board of her professional association, consulted for other nonprofits and organized the social justice discussion series at her church.

In addition, Pelton regularly brought her work home with her. She snuck the time she needed to meet all her obligations by sacrificing sleep, quality family connections and, eventually, her health.

"I was staying up for hours after the kids went to bed, getting four hours of sleep a night," Pelton recalls. "I was living in a fog of fatigue. I was exhausted all the time and was getting sick frequently. I had recurring infections, frequent stomachaches and migraine headaches."

Pelton's overdrive habits put her family's well-being at risk, too. "After work, I was cranky and had no energy to do things with my kids, so we just watched TV," she says. Healthy, homemade meals, active family pursuits and thoughtful conversations all fell by the wayside.

Then, last summer, Pelton's doctor told her she needed to slow down. "He saw that I was on the verge of exhaustion, and he told me things could get much worse if I kept burning the candle at both ends," she says.

So Pelton pooled her unused sick days and vacation days, stepped aside from her volunteer commitments, and took a four-week mini-sabbatical to rest, reflect and reconfigure how she spent her time.

She started feeling better almost immediately. Plus, she had more time to foster healthy family habits. "I become more conscious about how we ate. We started eating meals together at the table and having conversations. The kids started participating more in cooking meals, too, and learning about what to eat, how to select it and how to make it," she says.

"I've also had more time to help them make better choices, whether about physical health, such as going for walks instead of collapsing in front of the TV, or mental health - taking the time to talk through situations with them."

Pelton learned from experience what many of us know in our bones: Time is a key factor in creating a healthy, happy family. And while taking a lengthy vacation like Pelton's isn't a bad way to reboot a broken system, the key to maintaining healthier patterns is integrating small, daily priority shifts that can be sustained over time. Here are some perspectives and ideas to get you and your family started down a healthier path.